Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Nerdism of the day


I took this idea from my big sis, but I want to apply it here as well

A nerdism is pretty much something that I do that really proves I am a nerd. I do this kind of stuff all the time, so I should have enough to post daily.


Today's Nerdism...

I had one of those multitools. Key word is had. You know, the ones that come in a little black belt pouch. Well, I also own a set of Wiha screwdrivers. Yea, the ones that cost $15 each and the kind that every good nerd should own. I have been carrying the two most used drivers around in my backpack (another nerd tool) for a few years now, and Hulings Innovation kicked in.

Take pouch, cut small holes in the bottom, insert screwdrivers.

Brilliant.

Nerd rage of the day

I am going to try and post one of these a day so you can try to understand what goes thru the mind of a nerd.

So today's nerd rage...

The Microsoft wireless mouse/keyboard combination. While this little piece of heaven can seem enticing at first.... only $19.99? Wow, that's a good deal.... NO! Do not be deceived! What they don't print on the box, but bury in the user manual is that this piece of shit only has a range of 3 feet.

3 feet.... There aren't enough swear words to describe the level of stupid of that. What's the point of even being wireless? If you put the receiver (the same size as a mouse, but with a cable attached to it) under your desk, you have a very nice paper weight.

So here is your tip folks...

If you are thinking about buying a wireless system, spend the extra money, because "When it comes to electronic computer accessories, the more you spend, the better you're gonna get."

Defining a Nerd Part I

Preface...

So I was thinking today, am I a Nerd?

If you are someone like me, seeing (or reading in this case) the same word too many times, that word becomes annoying. Let me warn you right now, you are going to see a lot of commas, and the word "Nerd" more than you will care to see.

So again, I was thinking today, am I a nerd? The short answer is yes. Fortunately for you and I, I have been blessed with certain abilities in my life that will help us on our journey to defining the word properly.

My father, whom I would consider a geek (we'll get to that word later), has passed down the ability to write. He has just published his first book titled "Just Middle Manager". It has to do with Archetypes, which I know very little about. I do know that if I need to figure something out about a certain type of person, he is the guy I ask.

My mother, who has the most beautiful voice on the planet, has blessed me with the ability of music. She has inspired me to play guitar, and to further my creativeness throughout my life.

Those two people have defined the basis of life for me. I have picked up quite a few things along the way, most importantly, my nerdiness. When I was younger, I had an obsession. That was to take things apart to see how they work. The two biggest examples of that are when I was around 12 or 13, my brother and I got BB guns for Christmas. Well I'll be damned if I didn't want a sawed off bb gun. Of course my father wouldn't let me use his plethora of power tools, so I had to do something I like to call "Hulings Innovation".

Before I go any further, I need to define that word for you. Hulings Innovation is when you are faced with a situation, and improvise to a point of overkill or borderline stupidity. It can be brilliant or just downright "I can't believe you even attempted to do that".

So back to the bb gun story. So I wanted a sawed off. I mean, who wouldn't? I noticed that there were screws all over the thing, so I thought to myself, "I can just take it apart and remove the stock!" I then proceeded to remove the screws... One by one, I was that much closer to attaining my dream. Then, suddenly, the thing flew apart and springs went flying everywhere. I didn't panic, as I (as all Hulings do) had prepared for just such a devastating emergency. I walked back into my house, and grabbed... You guessed it, little brothers bb gun. "I'll just take this one apart, being more cautious OBVIOUSLY, and see how it all goes back together." Well, I'm sad to say, that's the last time Andy and I shot our guns.

The second example of my obsession happened a few years later my freshman year of High School. This later turned out to be revenge for my father not letting me use his power tools. I took shop class that year, and the time came for "Small Engine Repair". I proceeded to ask my father if I could take his brand spankin new Craftsman lawn mower to school for shop class. I assured him that he would have it back at the end of the week, and that we were just going to clean it up and give it a tune up. Lucky for me, my father is a very gullible man. What he didn't know is that we were going to be completely dissembling his shiny new toy, and then putting it back together. I'm pretty sure that it's still sitting in the shop class in the box I left it in 18 years ago. Sorry dad... But hey, you don't have to worry about grass where you live, so it all worked out.

Over the years, I developed an interest in electronics. Mostly of the stereo kind. My parents had an old stereo system and I sort of took ownership of it when they divorced. The thing broke weekly, and I was more than happy to remove the back plate, replace the paper clip that I put in place of a fuse (thank GOD for MacGyver), and put it all back together. Later, I figured out how to add more speakers to it, and eventually had a wall of speakers in my bedroom. What this did for me, was give me a basic understanding of how sound and electronics worked together in harmony. Taking two of the most influential things in my life, and tying them together.

My friends, and family, would call me and ask me to come over and fix their stereos all the time. My grandmother was amazed at what I could do. You know, cause, these fan-dangled electronics are just too much for her...

After getting married and having a few kids, I started to work construction. Thru the knowledge of Rob and Chad, I gained an extensive understanding of electricity as we wired and rewired many houses together. I had a blast doing it, and still wish I could. Crappy for me, I ended up gettng carple tunnel from all the hammer swinging (double duce baby). I was told by the doctor that gave me my surgery, "If you go back to that hammer, I'll see you in six months". I thought long and hard about it, and decided to go back to school at ITT Tech.

At about this time (around 2003), My father had gotten a new computer to replace his AOL machine.

Side note here. He still pays for AOL as far as I know for the email address.... REALLY DAD?

Anyway, he was kind enough to give me my first computer. We had one in the family long before this, but I was only allowed to play games on it. Never before had I had my own. I was like a kid in a candy store with a fist full of cash. So many little parts! So many wires! I swear to God I tore into that thing like a crazed, bloodthirsty hyena.

As my ex-wife can attest, I began my journey as a GEEK. The first level of a nerd. A geek is someone that wants to be a nerd. They have the basic understanding, the skills to achieve, the tools to do so, but lack the experience that a weathered nerd has. They enjoy going to Best Buy, and looking at all of the things they wish they knew how to use, and spend no less than 20 minutes talking to a guy in the computer department about what they DO know. This particular stage of a nerd depends on the dedication and aspiration a person has. They can be stuck in this stage forever, and unless they take the next step, are doomed to roaming Best Buy.

I would spend hours and hours on my computer. Not because I was having fun, nooooo, but because I was trying to figure out how and what I just messed up. I would randomly delete files, and wonder why I would get a Blue Screen of Death. Yes folks, Microsoft actually defines a BSOD, as a Blue Screen of Death. Anyway, this is the most important move to attain full nerd. Having the drive to fix your own problems is something only a few people have. I was determined.

After a few months, I had determined that my computer wasn't fast enough. Oh if you only knew how many times a day I STILL think that. At the time, my mother had moved out of her house, and didn't have need for her bad ass super computer with a FRICKIN CD BURNER!!! OMG!!! She said I could "borrow" it. Bad move mom, you never lend a geek an electronic. I think I had it for 15 minutes before I had it completely torn apart. Taking parts from the other computer I had, I had a pretty nice machine going.

I'll continue this later this week. If you want to read, stay tuned!